Welcome back gentle reader. Since the last report we’ve actually played three games, the first two of which, sad to relate, passed largely unregarded by history until now. The thrilling third match is reported below for your considered delectation. As for the first two, the first was a sad 3-0 loss against Ourimbah which broke our winning streak but not Tom’s 100% record (he wasn’t there) Read more
It was the best of games, it was the worst of games. Seriously, it was both, read on and you’ll find out. No doubt conscious of their previous 3-0 win over us earlier in the season – a game which your faithful scribe and several others players missed – we gathered on the sunlit fields of East Gosford in the hope of continuing our extraordinary run. Read more
Q: What do the Barnstoneworth 35Cs and the best place to snort cocaine off a hooker have in common?
A: They’re both ‘off the bottom’
Yes, gentle reader, you read that aright. After a protracted period as pointless as the Eurovision Song Contest, we now have another 3 shiny points which doubles our total to a glorious 6. But let me tell you how it happened. Read more
What you are about to read may change your life. Do not adjust your set, but do pay attention because there will be a test at the end.
If you had been there for the pre-match briefing (and frankly, why weren’t you? Read more
We are without doubt living in times of change. Upheavals in Europe, chaos in the Middle East, and quite what the USA is doing is anyone’s guess; but I think it’s fair to say that Saturday 13th May brought more than its fair share of surprises on the coast too. Read more
There comes a time when even the strongest, most enthusiastic and motivated football team must eventually come to terms with the brutal truth of a cosmically indifferent universe. When their team is decimated by injury and the capriciousness of fate; when their entire division is made up of teams that have descended from on high to toy with the minnows below; and when your team belatedly realises, with the crushing finality of a falling coffin lid, that instead of us waiting to play the whipping boys in the division, everyone else is thinking that about us. Read more
So there’s a couple of matches to tell you about, dear reader, but before we get into those Boy’s Own tales of sporting heroism, we must first pause and acknowledge with reluctance the retirement from the beautiful game of our long serving centre back Jason Horne. After putting his Herculean body on the line, often quite literally, repeatedly for us over the years, he has sadly now decided to hang up his boots. Read more
Welcome back chaps. Here we go again.
But before we get into it, may I respectfully request that you all assume the appropriate position, and sing the following lustily to the tune of your national anthem: Read more
Buoyed by our titanic winning performance midweek, The Legends returned in triumph to Terry Oval looking for their first win all season on that blessed turf. Our opponents were Umina, against whom we had previously had a draw that should have been a win, and a loss that should have been a draw. A pre-match inspection confirmed that as usual about 20% of the pitch was unplayable due to marshland, potholes and strips of butcher’s grass etc. Read more
Games against East Gosford are like hookers on a shady street; you wait ages for one, and then two come along in quick succession. Finally though, after rain enforced rearrangements of previously rearranged games, the two teams met last Saturday at Hylton Moore Oval. Last time out we had, it’s fair to say, handed their asses to them with a finely sculptured 5-0 win that remains our most convincing win. Read more