It was the best of games, it was the worst of games. Seriously, it was both, read on and you’ll find out. No doubt conscious of their previous 3-0 win over us earlier in the season – a game which your faithful scribe and several others players missed – we gathered on the sunlit fields of East Gosford in the hope of continuing our extraordinary run. Read more
Missing some key players and with few reserves, Barnstoneworth turned up to Oval 2 (or was it Oval 1?) at Umina with no great expectations. This turned out to be a prescient attitude as the afternoon wore on. Read more
Q: What do the Barnstoneworth 35Cs and the best place to snort cocaine off a hooker have in common?
A: They’re both ‘off the bottom’
Yes, gentle reader, you read that aright. After a protracted period as pointless as the Eurovision Song Contest, we now have another 3 shiny points which doubles our total to a glorious 6. But let me tell you how it happened. Read more
It’s sometimes said that consistency is one of the hardest things to achieve. This certainly seemed to be the case with Barnstoneworth this week when we met for a re-match with a team we beat 7-1 earlier in the season. Missing some key players and having only one reserve didn’t help the situation, but let’s not make excuses, it was a pretty dismal performance. Read more
What you are about to read may change your life. Do not adjust your set, but do pay attention because there will be a test at the end.
If you had been there for the pre-match briefing (and frankly, why weren’t you? Read more
After the storm of scandal and fiasco generated by his last match report, your correspondent approached this one with considerable trepidation. Fortunately though, the match in question today was one fought between two equally-matched sides who both played with gusto, and it could have gone either way quite easily. Read more
We are without doubt living in times of change. Upheavals in Europe, chaos in the Middle East, and quite what the USA is doing is anyone’s guess; but I think it’s fair to say that Saturday 13th May brought more than its fair share of surprises on the coast too. Read more
** We have edited part of this report as it has caused offence for which we sincerely apologise **
This was a closely-fought game that started out as a walkover, and ended in farce, debacle and a seriously disabling injury for fullback Anthony Broadbere, cut down in the midst of the best attacking foray we’ve ever seen from him. Read more
There comes a time when even the strongest, most enthusiastic and motivated football team must eventually come to terms with the brutal truth of a cosmically indifferent universe. When their team is decimated by injury and the capriciousness of fate; when their entire division is made up of teams that have descended from on high to toy with the minnows below; and when your team belatedly realises, with the crushing finality of a falling coffin lid, that instead of us waiting to play the whipping boys in the division, everyone else is thinking that about us. Read more
This match was amply summarised by a player as we walked off at full-time: “Well that was F***ing Horrible.”
Enough said.
Final result: Barnstoneworth Utd D South 0 – 5 Umina.